Before I start moaning, let’s define what social selling is. Hootsuite says, “Think of social selling as modern relationship-building. Actively connecting with potential customers on social media can help you be the first brand a prospect considers when they’re ready to make a purchase. And it can replace outdated relationship-building and sales techniques like cold calling!”
(So cold calling is outdated. K.)
Social selling is your business being all matey and first names with prospects on social media. It takes the sting out of selling with relatability, innit.
Here’s what we’re covering:
Social selling reminds me of an enquiry I had. A guy was dead keen on hiring me. (It’s always nice when someone reads my content and still wants to work with me.) He hires freelancers and thinks I’d be quite the addition to his marketing team.
FYI: when agencies get in touch, it almost always goes nowhere because they run their business how they want, the thing is, as a freelancer, so do I, and that’s something these people don’t get. They confuse you with an employee.
After three messages we decided this would be a bad idea. The reason why was——you won’t believe this——social selling. This agency owner insisted I nurture a connection with him BEFORE he’d consider me, and I would do that by hopping on a free call.
Lol.
What’s wrong with relationship building?
Absolutely nothing. Relationships are ace. And you might love social selling because relationship-building is your thing. Maybe you get giddy about Calendly links for virtual coffees but in most cases, social selling AKA relationship building is unnecessary. Quite often it’s a complete waste of your time. Free ‘getting to know you’ power hours leave you woefully out of pocket because folk take the piss out of freelancers who work for free.
“Certain people can sniff out vulnerability. They sense an insecurity and capitalise on it for their own gain. This is what’s happening with the ‘working for free’ DM. These ‘clients’ can taste your inexperience. And if you’re wearing your newcomer status like a bloody great beacon, they will seize the opportunity to take advantage.”
>>Freelancers: 4 lies about working for free<<
Social selling attempts to soften the blow of sales. Laughably, some people in marketing are shit scared of selling, they’re desperate for a more palatable alternative. But with social selling, you’re still selling only now it’s under the pretence of getting to know potential clients. That sounds smarmy and disingenuous——the opposite of what social selling is supposed to be.
Relationships happen naturally. Genuine connections don’t come about under contrived conditions. Take the guy who wanted to work with me, how does he think ONE call equals a business relationship? It takes months, sometimes years to do that. An hour later, we’d barely be one notch up from strangers——not even acquaintances. Also, I’d be on my best behaviour, not my authentic self. That isn’t relationship-building, that’s amateur dramatics. Sure, he might get a flavour of who I am, but that’s not going to tell him shit about my skill as a writer.
But what really pissed me off was this guy contacted me. He sent ME a message because my marketing had done its job, it had convinced him I’d be a good fit. The mind fucking boggles.
“These lying potentials are not gagging to work with you. So before you get breathless at the thought of their loving embrace, slam on the brakes and become the ultimate ice queen.”
>>Prospects lie when they say you’re a perfect fit<<
Can you imagine having to build a relationship with everyone you hired/bought from? You’d be emotionally exhausted. What if you need an emergency plumber? Most sex workers don’t get to know their clients, FFS.
When to build relationships.
After you’ve done a good job, is the correct answer. A client takes a punt, hires you and you do everything you said you would (and more) so now you’re a rare gem to be cherished. Why would they try to be pally with you beforehand, you might turn out to be a complete twat?
Are you qualified?
Because if you are an expert in your industry, people notice. They visit your website (several times), they read your testimonials (ooh-err), and they gobble up your content (again, ooh-err) until finally, they make contact. In most instances, they won’t (rather presumptuously) send a message insisting you build a relationship first. And that’s because when people want you, they just know, they don’t dick you around. (And that goes for any relationship, btw.)
Social selling is not a failsafe.
Building a relationship doesn’t guarantee you’ve hired the right person. Yeah, you might hit it off on a call but a personality tells you nothing about how qualified a person is. Some people are charming bullshitters and some people struggle on calls, especially with strangers. There’s no getting away from it, hiring anyone is a gamble, there’s a risk things won’t work out but social selling won’t save you from that pitfall.
Emotions are big business.
Social selling is like a gateway drug to emotional incontinence. It’s the reason businesses piss out ‘feelings’ and it’s far from genuine. Directness is something I value. I’m very comfortable with businesses openly flogging their products and services. As an adult, I understand people have bills to pay. As long as the target market is right, I’m totally cool with selling and being sold to.
First published, 1st April 2024.
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